Mums in Spain Blog

Selling second hand baby and toddler items in Spain

2010-02-09T23:32:00.005+01:00

As an extension to the Mums in Spain site I have recently built a new site where mums can list as many items for sale as they want absolutely FREE. You can upload an image for the item you want to sell and as much information as you like. All you have to do is register on the site and add your entry which will be published immediately. Easy!! www.mummyloves.me

Do go to the site and have a look through what others are selling too. In today's age this is a great way to "recycle" and so much baby stuff looks like it has never been used or worn!

The Spanish School Experience

2009-09-29T11:45:00.002+02:00

What a roller coaster the last couple of weeks have been. I honestly thought after the first morning that I would never take my little one to the school gates again! If it left me traumatised, there was no telling the images that must have remained in his little mind. But perhaps children are fair more resiliant than I realised as after a couple of weeks I actually think he might have settled down.

The first day of school was so disorganised I was shocked. Children everywhere, unattended and crying, randomly making their way into the school building with little direction from anyone. Charlie's school in particular looks very uninviting...more like a prison block than an infant school, grey concrete and bars at the gate. As each parent literally pushed their child through the gate all we could do was stand and watch as our little cherished ones cried and pleaded to be let out again. It was so upsetting that I wasn't able to utter even one syllable to anyone until I was in the safety of my kitchen where I promptly burst into tears! Everything went through my mind - for a while thinking that I should delay my little boy's entry into "big school" for even a few more months until he was better prepared. He took a long time to get used to nursery and I feared the same for settling in at school, only this time he would have to do so in an environment where attention was shared between 19 other children and one teacher.

But I am happy to say that he surprised me, and that my fears at the beginning were perhaps those of a rather over-protective mother!! I am sure we will still get the bad days where he doesn't want to go, but after only 2 weeks he is already happy to stand in line with the other children and wait to be guided in by his teacher. Of course he needs constant reassurance from me stood at the gate that I am not going anywhere but I am so proud of him and how well he has adapted!

Well done Charlie!

Starting Age for School in Spain

2009-08-17T10:42:00.002+02:00

I appreciate that legally speaking you do not have to put your child in school until 6 years of age, but generally parents enroll their little ones for the school year that they turn 3. My little boy will be 3 in October, meaning that he will still only be 2 when he starts. As much as I know that this really is only "pre-school" it still makes me a little apprehensive that he is so young. Of course we do have a choice, but it is such a fine balancing act making these decisions for our children and you always wonder whether or not you are doing the right thing.

He has been going to nursery school for 6 months now and finally loves it. It was an up-hill struggle to get to that point! To his advantage a couple of his friends from nursery will be starting school at the same time as him so there will be a degree of continuity for him which he would miss out on if I delay him starting. The hours are 9-2pm, although for the first couple of weeks they do introduce them slowly starting with just 2 hours I think. Perhaps it is a case of trying him out and seeing how he adapts. Ultimately I can always pull him out if it really is the case that perhaps he isn't quite ready.

Pregnancy in Spain

2009-08-16T23:06:00.003+02:00

Once the joy of the positive pregnancy test has settled down and the reality of the next 9 months has hit, you can find yourself desperately trawling every information source for details of what you can expect, helpful advice about hospital choices, other mums' birth experiences, etc. Don't be surprised when every other person seems to have a horror story to share! This would be the same regardless of where you lived, and of course having a baby abroad makes the story even more dramatic and compelling.

It is an unfortunate reality that complications can and do occur during labour and delivery, but these cases are in the minority, and it is important to hold onto a sense of perspective when you maybe do find yourself bombarded with accounts of "horrific" birth experiences. I am not sure why fellow mothers feel the need to fairly insensitively share these horrors with their unsuspecting peers who are simply looking for a little reassurance, but trust me they will! There is absolutely no reason why you shouldn't expect an "average" birth experience, by that I mean avoiding complications or trauma. Birth is a painful process, there is no escaping that...it will hurt! But it is one day out of your life and it does end! Ignore all the chatter about pain thresholds because I don't think that has anything to do with it. Every single labour, just like every pregnancy, is unique. The woman who battles her way through a 42 hour labour should not be held any higher in regard than someone who had a "quick" 12 hour labour and delivery. The woman who turned to an epidural should not be considered less of a woman than the labouring mother who did it all with thin air alone!

I found from observing friends who had had children before me, who then sat and dissected every aspect of their respective births, they were almost competitive over how much they with-stood, how hard their labours were, etc, etc. I think it is really very important to talk about your birth experience afterwards, but when the opportunity does present itself there seems to be a need to "out-do" one another! As if we have something to prove, when surely we already have. The fact that we have a healthy baby in our arms is proof enough regardless of how it got there.

Coping with a Miscarriage in Spain

2009-08-15T14:53:00.001+02:00

One of our Mums in Spain members shares her experience following her recent miscarriage. Although a sensitive subject to approach it is an unfortunate reality for some, and we hope that this thoughtful contribution from Sam will help anyone else who might be going through a similar situation.

"A few weeks ago I sadly suffered a miscarriage with my second pregnancy. The miscarriage was what is known as a 'missed miscarriage' or silent miscarriage, in other words there was no sign of the miscarriage until my first scan at ten weeks and as the miscarriage was not going to happen naturally, I was advised to go to hospital for a D&C.
When we went for the scan we were told that the foetus had no heartbeat and although I was ten weeks into the pregnancy the size of the foetus was only 6 weeks meaning that this was when it had stopped developing. Of course nothing can prepare you for this sort of news and we were devastated and very sad. The doctor explained that 30% of pregnancies end this way and there is nothing you can do or did do to change the outcome, but of course you can’t help feeling guilty and a sense of loss. On top of dealing with the emotional side of the news we realised we would also have to deal with ending the pregnancy practically.
My gynaecologist told me that I needed to go to emergency at a hospital with a letter from her explaining what had happened and they would do the D&C that day, she told me to go as soon as possible and to not eat anything the night before. Because we have private medical insurance she advised me to go to the private hospital as I would probably be seen more quickly than at the busier public hospital. This all happened on a Friday morning.
That afternoon was a blur, we had to put the emotional side out of our heads and start to work out how we were going to get through the next few days and what to do with our two year old daughter. My gynaecologist had told me I could go to the hospital on Saturday and so we made arrangements to drop my daughter at my business partner’s house early the next day and to go to the hospital straight after.
On Saturday morning I didn’t eat or drink anything and still feeling drained and sad we dropped our daughter off and headed to the USP in Marbella. The emergency was quiet and we were seen straight away but I have to say the doctors were ‘rude’ to the point of ignorance and did nothing to ease our emotional state. They asked why we didn’t come the day before … to which we explained because I had eaten and because we had a toddler to look after, then they said that the gynaecologist was not available on a weekend and to come back on Monday. They didn’t seem to bothered about the fact that prolonging the pregnancy could lead to an infection or our emotional state. Having psyched myself up to get everything done that day, I was very tearful and unhappy when we left the hospital.
So we went home again and my parents flew in from the UK to look after our daughter which made everything easier and we all had a rather odd weekend and then on Monday morning I didn’t eat or drink anything again and we headed off to the USP. The weekday emergency doctors were slightly nicer than the weekend staff although sympathy is clearly not one of their strong points. They gave me an emergency appointment with the hospital gynaecologist and sent us off to the outpatient’s area to wait. Finally feeling like we were getting somewhere and it would all be over today we waited for an hour and then saw the doctor. The doctor was nice and did another scan just to confirm the miscarriage and then told me we’d have to wait until the next day to have the operation. Again I was in tears, when would this be over? He explained that we would need to return at 8am the next morning and that I needed to take some tablets that night to start the process of dilation and once again we headed home to wait.
At home that afternoon it occurred to me that I had never heard of taking tablets before a D&C and so of course I did the worse thing possible and googled the tablets!!! Googling confirmed my worst fears, they had given me the new ‘abortion pill’ and I was confronted with a number of horror stories about these tablets, their side effects and what may happen to me during the night if I took them! I have to say that this was not the best afternoon for me to be reading these kinds of stories and as you can imagine being in a rather fragile state emotionally anyway, I was beginning to get seriously stressed!! I was upset that I had not been given an option as to whether I wanted to take these tablets, nor had it been explained to me properly what I would be taking.

I realised that I did not have to take these tablets, that the procedure could be done anyway, but in my fragile emotional state and after several days of waiting I was worried that if I didn't take them the hospital might refuse to do the op. I tried phoning the hospital but the 'helpful' ( not ) receptionist wouldn't put me through to anyone and told me that in her 'medical opinion' I should take the tablets. My own gynaecologist was unavailable and so in desperation I decided to ring Dr Berral.

Dr Berral is a British trained Gynaecologist and Obstetrician who I had visited twice at his private clinic in Marbella. The first time for a 4D scan during my first pregnancy and the second time when I was having some gynaecological problems last year. Both times I found Dr Berral very helpful, professional and kind. I was still worried about calling though as with regards to the miscarriage I wasn't his patient and it was late at night by this stage.

When I called however, Dr Berral couldn't have been more patient, helpful or kind. He talked me through why the tablets were given to me and what would happen if I took them, he reassured me that if I didn't take them it shouldn’t make any difference and spent a good ten minutes or so calming me down and making me feel better about it all. Just after I spoke to him my own gynaecologist ( who I had left about 15 messages for ! ) rang back and also reassured me as to what would happen. Having spoken to both these doctors I felt much better. The theory was that taking these tablets would dilate my cervix and may cause some pain and bleeding in the night but would mean that the dilation part of the D&C would be avoided which is apparently safer for the patient as it makes the operation quicker and safer. The dose I was given was a lot lower than the ‘abortion’ dose and so my worse fear that I’d miscarry on my own during the night shouldn’t be realised. So in the end I did take the tablets before bed (but naughtily a lower dose than I was supposed too ) and as expected had some pain and bleeding in the night but nothing too major. ( Typically the hospital didn’t even mention the tablets the next day so I had a whole night of stress for nothing! )
So on Tuesday morning, five days after the first scan we got up at 6.30am, again I didn’t eat or drink and we made our way to the USP. We checked in at 8am along with a few other couples who looked like they were in the same situation as us and were told to wait in reception. At 10.30am we were still waiting and I was in considerable pain from the second tablet I’d been told to take in the morning. My husband was getting very cross with the staff as were the other husbands and nerves were getting very fraught. Finally at 11.30 I was taken to the ‘operating area’. I think it’s important to say that while the emergency, reception and admin staff at the USP ( on this occasion ) were not particularly helpful or kind, the nurses and doctors once you made it into the actual hospital were excellent. I was given hospital clothes to change into and then a bed and my husband was allowed to stay with me while we waited. The male nurse looking after us was friendly and informative. At around 12.30 I was finally taken to the theatre. I was given a local anaesthetic and remember dropping off at around 12.40 … at 1pm I woke up as they wheeled me out and it was all over.
I was taken to a ‘recovery room’ where another lovely nurse monitored me for a couple of hours, I was mainly dozing but remember her constantly asking if I was okay and taking my blood pressure and giving me painkillers. Having had a C section at the Galvez, I’d say the aftercare at the USP is a hundred times better. After a few hours I was taken back to the first room and the male nurse called my husband. I was feeling more awake by this stage and was able to sit up. After another hour or so and when the male nurse was sure I was okay he allowed me to get dressed and we went home.
We were home by around 4pm … finally it was over! I spent the rest of the day on the sofa watching TV. I’d been warned there would be some light bleeding and maybe some pain but I didn’t suffer any pain at all. Perhaps those tablets did have a purpose after all! I felt weak from the anaesthetic but that was all. On Wed I remained on the sofa, but was starting to feel a lot better. By Thursday I was up and about and by Friday life had returned to normal.
Obviously coping with a miscarriage is difficult and emotionally very fraught. I feel that if we had known we would never have been seen on the Saturday and that it was unlikely the hospital would have done the op on the same day as first going, the whole process might have been easier for us to deal with, but as with all things you live and learn. A few weeks on I feel a lot healthier, the ten weeks of this pregnancy were difficult, I felt ill for most of it and so maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. Luckily I had wonderful family and friends around me who were supportive and caring. Having been through this experience I’d urge anyone in the same position as me to really question their doctor as to what exactly is going to happen and when and to gather as much support around you as possible."
Samantha Sintes
www.indybel.com

Giving birth in Spain

2009-08-14T13:39:00.002+02:00

I always say the same thing when people ask me about giving birth in Spain - "different doesn't necessarily mean worse". Undoubtedly giving birth in Spain is for the most part a different experience to giving birth in the United Kingdom. For a start gas and air isn't used in Spain, but then nor is it in the vast majority of other European countries. Infact I think recall that it is considered old fashioned by many! It can also be said that Spain has had historically a more clinical approach to pregnancy and delivery than most, with the pregnant woman practically being treated as if she were "ill" as opposed to expecting a child. But as with everything, times change. What one woman may have experienced last year may not be relevant to a mum's pending experience this year. Admittedly the progression being made varies greatly depending on the part of the country you look at. There are certainly still many hospitals which are still heavily rooted in the ways of old, but equally there are many that are really making a conscious effort to provide more to the expectant mother. Up until the 1970s all births took place in the home and with a midwife present. It seems strange to me that things went so dramatically the other way when midwives were pretty much taken out of the equation completely, and pregnancy and delivery became entirely led by an obstetrician. I know that when I was pregnant in 2006, despite going to a private hospital, I wasn't given an opportunity to meet any midwife. When I asked for an appointment to see her I was told that wasn't possible and I would not meet any midwife until I was in labour! When I asked for a tour of the delivery suite they looked at me like I was mad, but they did organise it for me. Looking back I shouldn't have asked for it cos it truly scared me! It all looked so clinical and uninviting.....but of course the next time you go there it doesn't look half as bad as contractions are keeping you occupied enough that you don't even notice the clinical "feel" of the place!
Full text.

Hypnobirthing in Spain

2009-08-14T11:56:00.001+02:00

HypnoBirthing® is a complete birth education programme, that teaches simple but specific self hypnosis, relaxation and breathing techniques for a better birth. Mums in Spain brings you two stories from Hypnobirth Educators based in Spain. This technique could hold the answer to a calm and enjoyable birth experience.
HypnoBirthing® is said to be much more than just self hypnosis or hypnotherapy for childbirth, its advocates claiming that those who choose to pursue this “technique” will discover that severe pain does not have to be an accompaniment of labour, with birthing mothers learning how to release the fears and anxieties that they may have about giving birth and how to overcome previous traumatic births. Primarily it is about learning how to put yourself back in control of your birth - rather than blindly turning your birthing experience over to your doctor or midwife.
We all have a stereotypical view of hypnotherapy, perhaps from what we have seen on TV in recent years where sometimes unsuspecting “patients” don’t appear to know what they are doing or why. HypnoBirthing® however doesn't mean you'll be in a trance or a sleep. Rather, you'll be able to chat, and be and in good spirits - totally relaxed, but fully in control. You'll always be aware of what is happening to you, and around you.

Mums in Spain brings you two stories from mothers, both living in Spain, who not only turned to HypnoBirthing® for their own births, but were so impressed by its benefits they decided to become fully qualified HypnoBirthing® educators themselves. Please read Zoe and Juliette’s stories below. For those who might be interested in exploring this concept further, full contact details can be found at the bottom of the article for both Zoe and Juliette.

Zoe Prendergast - Barcelona

“Hello, my name is Zoe, I am mum to Osip who is now four, and we live in Barcelona. I really want to share my birthing story with all of you. I became pregnant whilst living in Spain. I wanted to have a natural birth, but as my pregnancy progressed I became aware that birthing in Spain is a very medicalised event. I heard alot of stories from other mothers who had experienced a great deal of intervention in hospital, from inductions to cesarians, when all they really wanted was to be left alone to birth in peace. There seems to be little understanding or tolerance of women who choose to birth their babies naturally amoungst medical caregivers in this country.
I finally decided that, to have the natural birth I wanted, the only realistic option was to find a private midwife and plan for a home birth, which I did. However, although this made me feel well prepared in a practical way, I did not feel at all prepared or supported emotionally. I reached the fifth month of my pregnancy with the realisation that I was actually carrying a great deal of fear about giving birth, not only fear about pain, but also the huge worry of ending up in hospital and getting into the downward spiral of one intervention leading to another.
On my last trip home to the U.K. at about 28 weeks pregnant I was flicking through a natural health magazineand I saw an ad for Hypnobirthing. As I had successfully become a non smoker using Hypnotherapy before I became pregnant, this ad caught my eye.So I gave them a call.
The course was amazing. I learned all kinds of simple self hypnosis and deep relaxation and breathing techniques that were especially tailored to birth preparation. I was relieved to find that alot of the course focussed on fear release using visualisation, really getting to the heart of my fears and helping me to find practical solutions to face any turn that my birthing might take. I came to understand that pain and discomfort came out of fear and anxiety, and without fear, pain could be eliminated.. We also looked at how to diplomatically deal with medical caregivers, how to write a good birth plan, and the birth itself was gone through in every detail. I left the course feeling very well prepared and relaxed.
In the last two months of my pregnancy I practised Hypnobirthing every day for about 30 minutes.This involved listening to C.D's and relaxing.
Osip's birth began one sunny morning in June with the show. I called my midwife and she told me just to get on with a normal life as I could be up to a week away from birthing.. I pottered around on the terrace planting marigolds! About 6 pm I realised that my contractions, or expansions as the are called in Hypnobirthing parlance, were coming every 10 minutes, although I was not experiencing any discomfort, only tightening sensations. I listened to my Hypnobirthing CD's and put myself into a state of deep relaxation. At 9pm my waters broke, I called my midwife who said she was on her way. I was still only experiencing tightening sensations, no pain at all. Expansions were now every two or three minutes. I went to the toilet, and there was Osip's head!!! My partner immediately calledan ambulance, and Osip was delivered by the lovely, kind ambulance lady about 5 minutes after she arrived. No pain, no pushing, no tearing. A wonderful ,calm, joyous home birth!
Osip was a very calm baby. Alot of Mums who have had babies using Hypnobirthing say their babies are calm and serene, no colic, no breastfeeding problems, good sleepers. it is obvoius that a good, calm, happy birth means calm, happy mothers and babies.
I was so impressed by Hypnobirthing that I decided to train as a Hypnobirthing educator. I am now running classes in Barcelona! Please do get in touch if you would like to know more about Hypnobirthing.”

Juliette Brooks - Costa del Sol

“Hello my name is Juliette and I have been based in Estepona, Spain for the last 9 years with my husband.

In 2005 I fell pregnant with our first child. I initially had all my care privately in Spain but soon realised my options for birth were quite limited. I was shocked and scared to find out that my only option regarding pain relief was an epidural. I really am not keen on needles and also knew the increased risks of intervention were much higher with the use of an epidural. I really wanted to try for a natural birth. At 24 weeks gestation we decided to birth at St Bernards Hospital in Gibraltar. Four days prior to my due date my contractions started at 7 minutes apart, we made our way down to Gibraltar and checked into the hospital at about 5pm, at about 10.30pm my waters broke and then things really picked up! It was at this point that I was asked if I wanted any pain relief. I had some pethadine and used entinox (gas and air) for the next few hours. My contractions were almost on top of each other for the last 3 hours!! Our daughter was born just before 3am. With a first labour that only lasted about 12 hours - I thought this was a great birth until I experienced my second.

We had to spend a short period of time in the UK in 2007. I was pregnant for the second time and wanted to do a refresher ante natal course. I contacted the NCT (National Childbirth Trust) in my area but all the classes were full!!! I was advised to look around for something else on the internet. You have no idea I lucky I feel today – if they had not been fully booked I would have never had the amazing birth that I did with HypnoBirthing.

I contacted a HypnoBirthing practitioner near to where I was living and she invited me along to one of her coffee mornings to meet other mums who had HypnoBirthed. I went along and had an amazing morning. I met 3 separate women all with different birthing stories but all who thoroughly enjoyed their births. They all birthed naturally and with little pain. There was another woman there who had had “special circumstances” ..... Or complications as most people know it. She also said that she would not have made it through without the HypnoBirthing – it enabled her to stay calm and make the right decisions without panicing. She also said she felt she had an amazing birth thanks to the HypnoBirthing.

I went home and that night I told my husband that I had decided to do HypnoBirthing. Needless to say he thought I was a complete fruit cake!!! But he said he would support my decision and attend the classes with me but not to expect too much from him.

On our first class – he was the one asking the questions and really got into it. By the 3rd session he turned to me and asked me why we had not thought about a home birth!!

I had to listen to the Rainbow Relaxation CD daily and began to read the book. There were all sorts of things to practise with each week but they were easy to do and did not take long. I used to listen to the CD when I went to bed at night – I do not think I ever got to the end of it without falling asleep!

My entire feelings changed towards birth. Although my first birth was incredibly painful, I knew that this birth would be completely different. After the course I had no doubt in my mind that I would be able to birth easily and comfortably.... and that is exactly how it happened.

My surges (contractions) started at about 5.30pm, I was comfortable and just getting on with things until about 8.30pm. My sister in law came to pick up our daughter just before 8pm and at around 8.30 I put on my Rainbow Relaxation cd and lay down on the sofa. The surge breathing (taught in the class) was amazing and I was comfortable all the time. The midwife arrived about 9ish, she checked my blood pressure and listened to the baby’s heartbeat. I had no internal checks at all. At about 9.15pm I asked if I could get into the birth pool, I knew if I didn’t get it then I may not be able to after as my legs were beginning to ache a bit. The feeling of the water was amazing.... it really helped me to relax even more. I now had to really focus on the CD that was playing and the breathing techniques. The visualisation techniques taught were a real help as well. I was still comfortable at this time although my legs were really aching now. I had 2-3 more surges and I thought to myself if this feeling in my legs gets any stronger I may have to have some entinox. Moments later I called out “she’s here”. I felt her move down. At 9.55pm the midwives added more hot water to the pool and I gently breathed her down- there was no forced pushing. At 10.03pm her head was out and she was born at 10.06pm.

Just over 4.5hrs of labour, with no pain relief. It was the most amazing experience of my life. No one ever wants to talk about good birth stories – all you ever here about is the bad and gruesome ones. I loved every moment of my labour and birth and 3 weeks after I decided to train as a HypnoBirthing practitioner so I could teach and share this knowledge with other women and birth companions here in Spain.

The HypnoBirthing course is a complete education programme for mothers and birth companions who want a calmer, gentler and easier birthing experience. It is nothing weird and certainly nothing new. HypnoBirthing has now been running for 20 years. Most people are sceptical at first and think they will feel out of control, when in actual fact hypnosis heightens your senses. It enables you to become deeply relaxed thus helping you to work with your body and your baby and not fight against something that is so natural.

It is suitable for all types of birth as well.... not just natural birth. Great for VBAC’s and Caesarean. What it achieves is a calmer birthing experience for you, your birth companion and your baby whatever the circumstances. 75% of natural births are with No Pain Relief.”

Zoe Prendergast

http://acupunctureforpregnancyandchildbirth.blogspot.com

Email: zoeprendergast@gmail.com This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it Mobile: +34 654 986 735 Tel: +34 93 319 7414

Juliette Brooks

Love Your Birth http://www.loveyourbirth.org

julie@loveyourbirth.org This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it Mobile: +34 630 131 349

Further Reading and Recommended Links:

HypnoBirthing® The Mongan Method – http://www.hypnobirthing.co.uk

Family Law in Spain

2009-08-13T16:43:00.001+02:00

In this article Eirene Trujillo, Spanish Abogado & Sandra Wrightson, an English Overseas Barrister with DeCotta McKenna & Santafé, guide us through the complexities of a parent's legal responsibilites as well as the right's of children here in Spain in the unfortunate event that their parents separate or divorce and the impact of both parties.
Many younger people are moving to Spain to start a new life and enjoy the family-friendly lifestyle offered here, and many are starting families or relocating their families here. Inevitably some of these relationships will change and result in the parents living separate lives. It is at this moment that it is so important for the children and the parents that legal assistance is sought as soon as possible so as to navigate a solution to often complex issues.
Spanish family law recognises equal rights of children whether the parents are married or not. There are a number of established legal procedures and precedents that relate to parental responsibility and rights when a relationship breaks down, encompassing the range of issues such as custody, visiting rights and maintenance.

In Spain parents must be represented by a lawyer and Procurator as well as the “Ministerio Fiscal”, the official solicitor that defends the rights of children in Spain.

Since there are a number of obligations and responsibilities that parents must fulfill towards their children in Spain, it is important that both parents are legally identified. A paternity test can be requested, but in court it is expected that there is sufficient evidence to prove who the parent is to justify the request. To help show that the test is warranted it is expected that evidence such as family photographs, letters, cards and witness statements are presented.

Parental Responsibility

The obligations of parents towards their children to provide everything necessary for care and well being are balanced with their rights. Both parents in Spain have equal rights with regards to making decisions that affect the well being and up bringing of the children, pertaining to issues such as education, religion, health etc. So if the parents are living apart and one parent has custody over the child, both parents still have equal rights over key decisions in the up bringing of the child and the court will defend the rights and responsibilities of both parents, irrespective of where the child is living.

In additional during legal proceedings or in complex cases, such as domestic violence, where one parent cannot see the other, both parents still retain the right to have access to and share in the life of the child. So even in cases where the parents cannot have contact, visiting with the child can still be arranged in a controlled, safe environment such as “Punto de Encuentro Familiar” or Family Contact Centre.

Custody & Access

In Spain, with regards to legal decisions over child custody & access, the court takes into account the views of children who are mature enough to express their views, this can vary but is generally children over 12 years. This progressive approach helps to balance the rights and wishes of the parents with those of the child. Typically though we find that parents already base their custody requests on the wishes of the children, but in contested cases, it should be noted the rights of a mature child will be considered.

In cases when parents have reached an amicable solution to custody, without the need to legal challenges, the court will still want to see that there is a default legal agreement in place in case that the amicable agreement breaks down. In Spain the typical default agreement is weekends with alternate parents, 4 weeks over the summer and alternate Christmas and Easter festivals.

Maintenance & Child Support

In all cases in Spain both parents are obliged to provide their children with support,. If English law is applied this includes children who have been treated as part of the family even if one of the parents is not the biological parent. Spanish law does not recognise the obligation to pay maintenance to non-biological children and this can be important in “second” families. Maintenance encompasses the core elements of a child’s well being such as education, healthcare, clothing and housing.

It is worth noting that in Spain, maintenance is an equal responsibility in the eyes of the court and is not automatically awarded in the mother’s favour. In addition it will be proportional to the parent’s financial capacity and the relevant needs of the child. Should these elements change, then it would potentially be possible to seek a modification of the maintenance.

Another important issue is that Family Law in these matters applies in Spain when the child is “habitually resident” in Spain. Therefore it applies to children here in Spain even if they were born in another country, such as the UK or Ireland. So, even if the parents are not domiciled in Spain, but the child has been resident here for a number of months and has started kindergarten or school and formed friendships and relations here, then Family law disputes must be settled in Spain. If parents return to the UK for example, typically now the UK courts will refer the case back to Spain where the child has been habitually resident.

Once child support and maintenance has been requested legally and later awarded, it cannot be back dated to before the date of the legal request. So it is best to seek legal advice as soon as possible in the case of a relationship breakdown.

In general terms, Family Law in Spain is fair, balanced and progressive. However there can be delays in getting a court date. Parents cannot choose the jurisdiction in which to go to court – they must go to their local court and of course some courts are busier than others.

When thinking about families and children, it is also a little sad to consider relationship breakdown, but this is a fact of life and if parents can work together in a fair compassionate way with good legal representation, then not only are the rights of children respected and protected but the parents too can be confident of a fair solution, respecting and balancing their obligations and rights.

If you would like to book a confidential consultation and discuss Family Law, please contact Sandra Wrightson, De Cotta, McKenna & Santafé – the firm has offices in Mijas-Costa, Coín, Nerja, Granada & Tenerife, with associates in the UK and across Europe.

Sandra Wrightson is an English Barrister Overseas, at De Cotta McKenna y Santafé, your local law firm offering support with all aspects of Spanish Law for English speaking clients.The head office is at:

Centro Comercial Valdepinos 1 y 3ª
Urb. Calypso
29649 Mijas Costa (Málaga)

Tel.: +34 952 931 781
Fax: +34 952 933 547

Email sandrawrightson@decottalaw.net

website: www.decottalaw.com

The Truth about Stretch Marks

2009-08-13T13:17:00.000+02:00

HAVE YOUR SAY - I at least was told, when I was pregnant, that despite all the marketing behind preventing stretch marks during pregnancy there really was very little that you could do to prevent them. It was a case of if you were going to get them...you were going to get them!
Mainly due to a hereditary predisposition, if your mother had got bad stretch marks, or if you already had stretch marks on your body from other "conditions" then you were most likely destined to get them.
So when I was pregnant, struggling with my burgeoning tummy, I was convinced that it was only a matter of time before I lay victim to this dreaded "stamp of pregnancy". I did apply oil to my tummy most days thinking that at least it would keep my skin supple and healthy (I did love my pregnant stomach!) but I didn't really believe that it would keep stretch marks at bay. I already had some minor stretch marks from growth spurts, and no doubt fluctuating weight over the years already so I was sure that it was simply a matter of time. But they never materialised! Of course I'm not complaining...but what really is the truth about stretch marks? My skin was clearly prone to them, but a huge fluid-filled belly for the final couple of months of pregnancy was not enough to force them out. So should we keep applying the oils and lotions? Do they make a difference? Or are we already fated, one way or the other? If you don't get them for your first pregnancy, does that mean you will escape them for you second?

There seems to be plenty of advice and opinion out there but what are your experiences? Take the opportunity to have your say in the comment section at the end of this article.

Colette Bouchez shares some fairly well reported advice below:

Stretching the truth: How to beat stretch marks - for good!
Among the most common of all pregnancy-related skin problems is undoubtedly stretch marks -- those deep red, sometimes blue lines that can occur not only on your tummy, but also on your breasts, upper arms, hips, thighs and even your buttocks. Medically known as striae gravidarum, they usually begin in the second trimester frequently starting at the navel and fanning out over your abdomen in what a pregnant girlfriend of mine now refers to as her "personal beach ball" pattern!

Who is at risk?
While the folklore on how to prevent stretch marks has practically become a cottage industry, the reality is, there are only a few factors that are capable of influencing whether or not you experience this problem. First and foremost, is your heredity. If your mom had stretch marks -- or if you had them in a previous pregnancy -- then you're a prime candidate now. Ethnicity matters too. While African American women are the least likely to experience stretch marks, natural blondes with light complexions are at greatest risk.

The good news is there are also some factors related to stretch marks that you can control. So, even if you are prone to this problem, there are ways to decrease your risks -- starting with watching your weight and keeping extra pounds under control. How can this help? When skin is forced to stretch too rapidly, the underlying dermal structure breaks down allowing stretch marks to develop. And while it is imperative that you gain a healthy amount of weight during your pregnancy, a slow and gradual gain is best -- not only for your baby but for your body.

Keep your skin hydrated
Equally important is keeping your overall body complexion well hydrated, particularly your stomach and breast. This is especially important if you are gaining weight quickly. Because skin that is supple and soft has more elastic qualities, you are less likely to experience stretch marks if your skin is well moisturized.

While from a cosmetic standpoint almost any product that is good for dry skin is great for belly moisturizing, it's also important to remember that the more a product is absorbed into the skin, the more likely it is that tiny capillaries -- already dilated from pregnancy -- can pick up ingredients and carry them into your bloodstream and eventually, to your baby.

This can be especially disconcerting if you are using product containing a lot of chemicals and especially preservatives. While what you retain will be exceptionably small and not much cause for concern, whenever possible doctors recommend that during pregnancy you choose the purest, most natural skin care products possible, particularly for use on your stomach. One product that can give you all the moisturizer properties you need without any risks is pure cocoa butter

While there is no scientific evidence to show that it prevents stretch marks, generations of women have proven that it does appear to have some preventative properties. This all- natural fat derived from the cocoa bean is known to have superior moisturizing properties and is able to keep skin moist and conditioned enough to avoid stretch marks. The key, however, is find as close to 100 percent pure cocoa butter as you can get -- or order the equivalent of medical grade cocoa butter direct from your pharmacy.

Not too late to lubricate!
And remember -- for those of you already experiencing stretch marks, it's not too late to lubricate. Stretched skin that is kept supple and soft is far more likely to return to normal once your pregnancy weight is lost -- and any stretch marks you do experience are far more likely to disappear on their own, usually beginning two weeks after you deliver.

Preventing stretch marks -- naturally!
If you let her, Mother Nature could be your skin's best ally during pregnancy. Some of the most skin-quenching products you can use, are those you make yourself with ingredients that can be found right in your kitchen.

What you can try:

Two tablespoons of honey in a warm bath can draw moisture to your skin. If you're a shower girl, bring a plastic squeeze bottle of honey into the tub, and after tummy is wet, squeeze a little honey directly on your belly and rub in. Let it remain while you continue your shower and rinse off right before you're done.
Make your own all-natural cocoa butter by heating equal parts of grated cocoa butter and coconut oil in a microwave until melted. Stir well, let cool and apply generously on your tummy, hips, buttocks, breast and arms.
Soak a clean, white cloth in small dish of warm milk, squeeze out and apply the compress to your belly for up to 15 minutes. Re-dip several times, and reapply as needed.

Price Comparison - Spain vs. United Kingdom

2009-08-13T13:12:00.001+02:00

Spain is well regarded as a "family friendly" country. Certainly for those coming over here on holiday they will find that the local community are very welcoming to young families, children are accomodated in restaurants and bars, quite the opposite to the United Kingdom for example. Spain in general appears to be very family orientated and this has always left me somewhat surprised at the lack of "amenities" for children, young babies in particular and also the elevated price for any products, particularly what I would call necessities such as nappies, baby wipes, formula milk, clothing, etc.
Nappies for example are practically double the price to what I could expect to find in the United Kingdom, as is formula milk. I actually live close to Gibraltar so I used to make the treck over there to stock up on milk instead of buying it in Spain as the difference in price was so big. Why is this? Surely these items cost the same to produce here as they do elsewhere in Europe, yet only 45 minutes down the road from my home and I can stock up the same items for half the price or less.

Do you find it the same? Any ideas why this is? Share your thoughts and comments.

Mums - Finding the Time to learn Spanish

2009-08-13T13:06:00.002+02:00

As every mother will know, from the moment that we find out that we are pregnant the days where we may have put ourselves first are numbered. Finding a quiet moment to read a book, take a bubble bath, watch our favourite programme on television or flick through a glossy magazine by the pool all become distant memories.

So what of our Mums in Spain, perhaps falling pregnant after only a short time here, or those with young families who made the brave move to a new country and hopefully a better way of life? With so many other things to think about and prioritise, something as obvious as learning the local language can easily be overlooked or put to one side for when you have more time.
There are many regions of Spain where it is conceivable that you could cope with speaking no or very little Spanish. But having a young family tends to make that unlikely, or at best more difficult. Something as simple as registering your baby’s birth can become a complete nightmare if you aren’t able to make yourself understood at your local Town Hall. Enrolling your little one in the local school might seem a thoroughly daunting task when you struggle to understand the application form or the admission instructions. But it isn’t just bureaucracy that can become more laborious and painstaking because of a lack of language skills.

Standing outside the school gates, waiting patiently for your little one to come running out at the end of the day, but feeling like you need to blend into the background in case someone talks to you and you don’t understand. Knowing that you are in English a very sociable and outgoing person, but because of your complete lack of Spanish you end up feeling isolated and frustrated. Being nervous of any school activities like parents’ night or school sports day, or simply not understanding your now bilingual child when they play with friends or socialise on the beach or in the park.

But like everything, it is possible to find the time and the rewards on offer from finding that time, from taking what for many is a brave step forward, are many and varied.

Julia Mattey, Language Co-ordinator with Abla Lenguas has students who have lived in Spain for years and sign up for a total beginner's course. “They hadn't found time to learn the language so far and were quite happy getting by with half a dozen sentences” says Julia. So many of us are guilty of this, and to be perfectly honest depending on where you live in the country it would be possible to get by, but you risk missing out on so much.

Of course enjoying the experience of learning anything is also key to long-term commitment and success. “We try to make our classes lively, fun and full of student participation with the main emphasis on speaking practice” Rosa Renuncio of Fun & Culture told Mums in Spain, “our classes are very much designed to increase confidence”. We all know confidence is one of the most important things to have when learning and using a new language out in the real world.

It is one thing to apply yourself in the class room, but it can be all too easy to simply seize up when we step outside of this protective environment! A good friend of mine used to say to me “feel the fear, and do it anyway” – I used to feel that way myself when I first started practising my shaky Spanish but with the right encouragement and preparation this fear doesn’t have to engulf you!

If you happen to be a mum who might be considering improving their Spanish or even starting from scratch, it can be so easy to put up hurdles for ourselves and hide behind certain excuses. But there are lots of professionals out there who are able to offer you flexible class times and even if you aren’t able to consider going to classes regularly for whatever reason take a brave step and reach out into your Spanish community, maybe smile and say hello to a Spanish mum at the school gates. Embrace your life in Spain, there is no need for you to blend into the background.

Raising Bi-lingual Children - Is it too late?

2009-04-03T16:02:00.010+02:00

Written by Christina Bosemark, founder of Multilingual Children's Association. If you google Christina you will find lots of other useful articles.

"After we talked, I've spoken nothing but French to my one year old for close to seven weeks
now. All of his new words are French, and from what I can tell he understands me completely." Not even two months into her campaign to raise her two children speaking French as well as English, Sheilagh Margot Riordan in Forida has noticed a dramatic difference in the progress between her two children: "My three and a half year old is much trickier. Even though I speak only French to her, she replies in English, but I guess that she understands about 70 of everything I say." Frankly, Sheilagh worries that it's already too late for her over-the-hill three year-old to become a fluent bilingual.

In our culture it sometimes feels that if you didn't spring for ballet lessons at two or violin at three, it's all over. While there's no doubt that the optimal moment to start learning languages is at birth, it's not at all impossible to achieve fluency later in life. The more language interaction you provide, the more dramatic the progress, and the easier for the child. Even older children are still kids, and they'll remain chatty and unhampered by self-consciousness. Still, transitioning into multilingualism will require motivation; here are several tried-and-true tips.

You know how when you announce that it's bedtime, your kid says, "Why?" You'll get the same
reaction to your new language program. "Why do I have to say it in Korean if I know how say it
in English already?" This is a fair question, and the answer needs to be either one of necessity, fun, or flattery. Not much else will fly. Here are some possible answers: "Because I/granny/everyone else here only speak Korean." "This book/this game/this song is in Korean." "Because you did it sooo well yesterday." "So you can teach it to baby Ethan when he is a big boy like you." "So you and Kim can have your own secret language."

After the explanation your next step will be to speak only in the minority language yourself (or nanny, or whoever is your child's primary language source). When you get confusion and glazed looks, translate. And, be reasonable; accept replies in the primary language when you first start out.

When your child answers back in the community language, say "Yes," and then repeat the sentence in the minority language. If you know your child is able to say a particular word, but is struggling to remember it, jog her memory by providing the first syllable. Be careful not to dampen her enthusiasm. Don't make speaking the second language an inflexible rule or something that becomes onerous. You'll just inspire revolution in the ranks. You might require adherence to the language rules you've set up if you know she has the vocabulary - just as you demand 'pleases' and 'thank yous.' For example, when you're child is asking for a glass of milk, you can require that she ask for it in the minority language. But if she's excited about telling you what happened at the circus, just listen, and then repeat it back in the second language. That way, you provide her the missing vocabulary in a positive way.

And, as always, praise endlessly. Even when you are providing translations or the child has just issued sixteen grammatical errors in a four-word sentence. In fact, a child simply doesn't understand if you try to correct her before the age of three. Instead, just repeat the words correctly (a process known as modeling). Alternatively, you can make a joke and say, "Oops, that came out wrong!" Laugh and provide the right way of saying it, so you keep it playful rather than corrective.

Countless parents have asked me: "So now, how do we stay firm with our language use?" Once the child has the vocabulary to understand the second language, sticking to the family language system is essential -- if you don't, you're back to square one! Just think of the things you could never let your child do, even if she begs, whines, and tantrums: things such as riding in a car without a seatbelt, not brushing her teeth, or crossing the street by herself. Don't negotiate about using the language any more than you do about these things, and she will get the picture eventually -- despite the occasional earful. Give it at least six months, and your persistence will be richly rewarded.

Sheilagh says that she realizes her trouble is well worth it and has stopped worrying about beginning too late: "Instead of looking at the things I should have done (speak French since birth), I am looking at the great achievements we have made so far."

Using Insect Repellant during Pregnancy

2009-04-03T15:58:00.002+02:00

The short answer to this question is that it is probably better to use natural products (usually containing citronella oil) that are certainly safe for use in pregnancy. The insect repellents that contain chemicals do absorb into your bloodstream, and therefore, will cross the placenta and reach your baby. The most commonly used (and effective) insect repellent contains a chemical known as DEET (diethyl-3-methylbenzamide).

There have been some concerns raised about the safety of using this repellent in pregnancy or on young children, but it seems that if the concentration of DEET is no more than 10% of any product, (repellents are available with DEET concentrations of 5% to 100%) the likelihood of adverse toxic effects are extremely unlikely. In high doses DEET is toxic and ingestion of the chemical has been associated with seizures and death.

If you are travelling to a malarial area, it would be better to use DEET than not, as citronella only lasts for a short period of time, and malaria is potentially fatal. It's best to get advice from your midwife or GP before planning to go overseas.

A Spanish Homebirth Story

2009-03-30T01:58:00.003+02:00

I came across this birth story written by Dunja Jane and thought it might make interesting reading for other mums in Spain:

I am Australian but have lived in Spain for the last 16 years. I had my 2 daughters here in hospital and the emotional trauma has stayed with me since. They are now 12 and 14 years old.
In August 2005 I found to my partner's and my delight that we were expecting a baby. It was not an easy pregnancy - I don't really know why - maybe the years are taking their toll (I'm now 36) or maybe I was just over stressed with work and so on but at 21 weeks I was having an awful lot of contractions and was put to bedrest. Basically I stayed that way until the end which was very draining on everybody in the family but at least proved worth it in the long-run.
I need to explain breifly how difficult it is to have a home birth here in Spain. It was not that I originally set out to do this but it turned out to be the best option. I quite simply did not want to end up in the hospital again, with the drip, the monitor tying me to the bed, the interference from all the medical staff, the hospital environment and worst of all the obstetric chair (lithotomy position). I tried to see if things had changed since my 2nd daughter was born, but the answers I kept getting were not at all encouraging. There is no state health service here for home births. I started to look around - there were a couple of private "alternative" type clinics that did water birthing etc. but both rather far away from where we live. My 2nd daughter had been born in 1.5hrs so we were concerned that my 3rd would be even faster. No time to travel 2-3 hours to a clinic during labour.
After much searching and discussion between my partner and I - he seemed to be coming round to the idea of having our baby at home if we could just find someone qualified to attend us - I came across an association for home births on the net and got in touch with the closest midwife, who was only 40 minutes away. By this stage I was 32 weeks pregnant - baby was doing ok.....everything had pretty much settled down and now we had a viable option at last for having him at home. I spent hours and hours on the net researching and reading all I could lay hands on - that's how I found your site - and getting to know all the possible complications and arguments for and against. I was not getting any encouragement from my gynaecologist or from the state midwife who was monitoring my pregnancy. Any little thing and they would say - "oh you shouldn't have a home birth if you have this (streptococo)...or that (breech presentation)..." or any little thing. It was really hard on my confidence level even though I was feeling more and more sure about it all. In the end I had none of the things that could possibly cause any complications - baby was LOT-LOA most of the time, no infections of any kind, only some nasty pelvic symphysis pain throughout the latter weeks of the pregancy. I wanted our baby to be born at home in our space, with our atmosphere around him without all the unavoidable hospital interventions. Because it's not that you can go to the hospital here and they respect your wishes - no - you can waste your time arguing with them but in the end they are in control and are running the show.
Anyway....less grumbling about the failings of the public health system. I had found a great private midwife (and her small team) and even though they seemed to cater for a slightly - lets say - "hippy" clientele, I felt I could trust her and that everything would be ok. It did of course mean coming up with the necessary 1500 euros to pay for it all. So we decided to sell my old car. We didn't really need it anymore, and put the money to something we both considered really worthwhile. The midwife and her team went onto guard duty for me at 37 weeks and we started the count down. They brought the kit of emergency equipment to the house and made sure we had everything else they needed prepared.
Then the drama started. I started having very regular but painless contractions one afternoon which continued into the evening, so we called the midwife (Helena) and she decided to come with her doula (Pilar) that night. We were pretty concerned about the birth being so fast that they wouldn't get here on time. My partner and my best girl friend were a bit jittery about having to deliver the baby themselves in the rush. We started timing and walking and breathing.....went on for hours....everyone went to bed in the end and in the morning everything had stopped. Oh well - just a false alarm. Helena was so nice about it despite having had to sleep on the fold-out sofa bed which is not that comfortable. "I'd rather come and it be a false alarm, than not make it on time", she said. This was at 38 and a half weeks.
Four days later the contractions started again, this time significantly more noticeable but still not the pain I remembered from my previous 2 births. So we walked and breathed and they gave me some acupressure massages to help stimulate the contractions....and then nothing happened AGAIN ! The next morning before leaving to go home Helena gave me a VE and at least this seemed promising - my cervix was effaced and 1cm dilated and the baby was enganged although not very low. She thought it was likely that labour would start that evening again. But it didn't. And the days went by.....some odd contractions - maybe 4-5 every day, but nothing to say that labour was starting.
Wednesday all day they started to hurt a bit more seriously but now I wasn't going to be fooled - I'd given everyone enough sleepless nights already. Breathed through them...took it pretty easy all day, went for a nice walk in the countryside with Gabi my partner..... Then soon after getting to bed that night my waters suddenly broke. I'd been expecting this for weeks since baby was so incredibly active and almost violent in his kicking. So much water !......Call Helena again. She and Pilar came over in the middle of the night convinced that now it would all pick up. That's what we all thought - that's how it goes isn't it? You break waters and labour starts. That's what had happened in my previous births - once spontaneously and once artificially. Helena didn't want to check again if there was any more progress for fear of infections....but now surely it was just a matter of hours? The next morning - you guessed it - still not in labour.
Helena said in the hospital they will only wait a maximum of 24 hours before inducing labour once the membranes have broken. She knew that for many home birth midwives up to 72 hours was still ok but that I had to make the choice. It was my decision. This was pretty hard. She had left us a monitoring device - a doppler I think - and I had to take my temperature on the hour and listen to the baby just to check nothing was going wrong. He sounded really good all the time and there were no other signs of infection. But time was running out. All day Thursday and nothing, the night passed and still nothing. Helena called to know how long we were prepared to wait before going to the hospital. She was not in a position to induce me at home, unfortunately. We'd decided Saturday morning which still gave us until midnight Saturday to complete 72 hours.
Friday afternoon I was having some stronger contractions but only every hour or so. I was getting desperate.....it was not fair, after all we had done to be able to have our baby at home to have to end up in the hospital to be induced ! I started to breakdown....burst into tears and felt so defeated by it all. It seemed ironic that after half a pregnancy of panicking that the baby would be born premature in the end he would be forced to come out. I was 40 weeks now. But what was wrong? Why didn't I go into labour? After having a big cry about it all, Gabi and I went for a night time walk and came home to shower and go to bed and face the inevitable the next day. I was having more contractions but nothing really regular and with so many false alarms I didn't know how to interpret what I was feeling anymore but Gabi decided it was time to call Helena again. By this stage it was past midnight.....she wasn't really keen on coming out again unless we were really sure it was starting but quite frankly, I wasn't sure of anything anymore. The contractions started to be longer and more painful - lasting about 1.5 minutes each....just maybe, maybe things were starting to move. I lay down to wait for Helena to arrive and the contractions continued, getting more regular and stronger all the time. This was a good sign, at last.
An hour later Helena was here and she checked me this time to find I was 7cms dilated - so thank goodness, baby was coming ! The last 3cms were much more painful and harder to deal with than I had expected. I don't know if the drips they'd put on me in the hospital for my daughter's births had something to do with it or my age or what but this was getting excrutiating. One contraction would run into another with waves of pain in my pelvic bones.....I kept waiting for them to end like they had with my daughters....but this time was different.They didn't end. I went from severe transition contractions to pushing, something that hadn't happened to me with my other births. But I was so sore I couldn't move to get into a better position and lying on my side I was getting nowhere. I managed to find the words to let everyone know that I couldn't push like this and they immediately pulled me up into a sort of squat with Gabi supporting me from behind. This was better, but boy, did it hurt to feel the baby's head coming down.
I was feeling half conscious of what was going on. I knew I would feel the "ring of fire" like I never had before because they'd given me aneasthetics and an episiotomy in the hospital but this time I sure felt it. But somehow amid all my panting and sweating and feeling pretty delirious I managed to control the pushing so that I didn't tear and soon I could see his little (not so little ! ) head sticking out and then his shoulders and then he was screaming his little lungs out even before the rest of him was born. It was so incredible. We had so longed to see him finally and here he was, all red and slippery and very cross ! He wouldn't feed at first but did settle after a minute or 2 - then he covered me in meconium.
Helena clamped the cord and Gabi cut it so I could get into a better position to push the placenta out. On my hands and knees - as I would have liked to have given birth - I got the placenta out really easily despite it being pretty huge too. Then Baby was happy to feed at last and latched on beautifully and totally relaxed. It was so so so much better than the hospital - no bright lights, no noise (other than mine) no injections or drips or interference and just the 4 of us to welcome him into our world. My daughters had not wanted to witness the birth so we woke them just after - they hadn't even realised it was happening ! I'm sure I made a hell of a lot of noise but Gabi said I really only moaned through the contractions. Anyway - a warm shower, change of sheets and everything was cleaned up and we all cuddled into bed. Lyorel was born at 4.30 in the morning on the 22nd of April. I was a bit in shock from the pain still all that day but by the next I was so elated and so happy that we had done what we really felt was right. I'll do it again any day.
Lyorel's temper hasn't improved much I must say even though he's now almost a month old. His insides bother him a lot - makes a terrible fuss just to get a burp out but all this will go away, we know.....
I would recommend to anyone thinking about home birth to make the effort and do it....I was emotionally scarred from my experiences in hospital and they didn't help in my relationship with my daughters - especially the first. I was so detached, didn't even feel like that baby over there being examined by the nurse was anything to do with me. I now look back and feel so sad about it - so angry at having been manipulated and treated just like another body instead of like a whole person going through one of the most important moments of my life - giving birth to my first child.

Launch of new look site

2009-03-30T01:54:00.002+02:00

www.mumsinspain.com was relaunched earlier this month with a much clearer and sharper "look" for visitors. We have lots of exciting things planned for the development and growth of the site including an online shop. If you happen to be a business owner and would be interested in Mums in Spain promoting your products, whether you be a small home-grown project or a larger business venture, please do contact us for more information. Mums in Spain can offer you a great opportunity to reach a finely targetted audience advertise@mumsinspain.com

First Trimester Facts from a Midwife in Spain

2008-09-25T18:31:00.006+02:00

Congratulations if you have just found out you are pregnant! Now is the time to start planning ahead. This information is to help you make the early choices, which include personal decisions and some changes to your lifestyle which benefit both you and your developing baby.

You can address the following issues immediately you have a positive test. Start taking Folic Acid 400mcg daily, if not already doing so. This is to reduce the risk of Spina Bifida and related problems (neural tube defects) in your new baby.
It can be bought over the counter in any Farmacia. The most recent research also recommends:- stopping smoking, cutting out alcohol and reducing your caffeine intake – found in chocolate, coca cola & tea, as well as, coffee! Soft cheeses, unpasteurised dairy products, pates and uncooked smoked fish or meat products are not to be eaten by pregnant women. They may carry the risk of an infection, LISTERIA, which can be harmful to your developing baby. If you are a cat lover or avid gardener you need to take precautions against the organism causing TOXOPLASMOSIS. Cat litter and garden soil are the most common sources of infection so leave the litter tray to someone else, wear gloves in the garden and thoroughly wash hands afterwards. This infection also effects the developing baby.

Tiredness is common in the first 12 weeks. You may consider moderating your exercise regimen if you regularly keep fit. You will have more energy after 12-14 weeks but high impact sport eg; aerobics, skiing, horse riding are usually avoided throughout pregnancy. If you are a frequent airline traveller you may think about flying less just now, particularly if you have had problems early on, in a previous pregnancy. It is also advisable to avoid hot baths including thermal pools & jacuzzis found in Spas. This may all sound like quite a change, but in fact these measures will all have a positive impact on your pregnancy.

The next issue to consider is who is going to care for you over the next 8 months or so? You are not sick in the conventional way, but it is advisable to be seen and monitored throughout your pregnancy.Your choices include:-
1. the care in the public social security system (SSS)
2. an independent midwife
3. an Obstetrician covered by a private healthcare plan
4. an Obstetrician whom you pay directly
5. You can also consider a mix of these - being seen both by a midwife and/or private and public Doctors simultaneously.

Many women are unsure of where they will give birth until quite late in pregnancy in Spain. You do not ‘book’ into a public hospital ahead of time, as in other countries. This is accepted practice – as you now have the right to choose which public hospital you will have your baby in.

The role of the midwife in ante-natal care in Spain varies between centro de saluds, (local health centre) but principally it involves the 1st ‘booking’ visit, visits at the later stages in pregnancy and running ante-natal classes. This is quite different to practice in other countries. They then see you when baby is about 5 days old, but in the health centre rather than in your home. They either work in the centro de saluds or in the hospitals but do not inter-change as the ‘systems’ are separate, again, unlike elsewhere There are a few UK & other EU registered Midwives living on the Costa del Sol & throughout Spain. For the most part they work independently although some are employed in the Spanish state system.

You need to be registered with a GP in your centro de salud once paying into the SSS in Spain. This entitles you to avail of services in that centre and this is where you make the first appointment with the midwife or ‘matrona’. If you are not paying into the SSS but have been contributing in the UK, or any other EU country, you may be eligible for full care for up to 1-2years by applying for it through the National Insurance HQ in the UK, or the equivalent office in your EU country. The EU Healthcard (formally the E111) is for emergency care in any EU country and is not the correct way to access the Spanish healthcare system for long term care, such as is required or advisable in pregnancy.

Most private healthcare companies require previous membership to cover care and the birth of your baby. Many foreign or expat women here in Spain will choose a private Obstetrician by hearing about them from a friend or reading about them on-line. You need to be happy and feel confident in your choice. Perhaps write your important issues or questions down before your first appointment to help remember to ask them. Never feel you are unable to get another opinion or meet another Doctor.

Ideally make your 1st appointment for when you are approx 8-10 weeks in order to be in time to have the choice of having 1st trimester screening between 11-13 weeks. Your first visit will include taking a medical/surgical & gynaecological history and usually having blood taken for group, rhesus, haemaglobin, Hepatitis B, Rubella, Toxoplasmosis and HIV – as a general guide. Your weight/height ratio (BMI) will be checked along with your Blood Pressure. Your EDD (expecteded date of delivery or fecha de parto de probabilidad, in Spanish) will be confirmed by doing a ‘dating’ ultrasound scan. It is recommended that your Tetanus cover is updated if required.

Antenatal screening is then offered to women in order to give them the possible risk of their babies having certain abnormalities eg; Downs Syndrome or Spina Bifida. Remember 95% of babies are born healthy and normal. The results are only a possible risk - written down or expressed as 1:1000 or 1:300 for example - and if found to be high you will be offered more accurate and definitive Antenatal diagnostic tests.

NOTE This is a general guide and individual women may have specific needs that require different care or screening. Personalised information can be obtained from your Midwife or Obstetrician.

Anne Halpenny has lived in Spain since 1993 and has worked in St Bernard’s Gibraltar & continues in the Hospital Costa del Sol, Marbella. She organises Antenatal classes in English & provides support for new parents, before & after the birth of their baby.

Contact her www.irishmidwife.com or 630 231 037 or read more about her classes on www.mumsinspain.com/forum

Moving to Spain with children

2008-09-14T17:04:00.002+02:00

Embarking on a new life in a foreign country is a major step for anyone. It takes a good deal of nerve, boundless enthusiasm and an unswerving determination to overcome the inevitable obstacles. If you're making the "big move" with children, you're going to need all these qualities by the bucket load!

Over the last two decades an increasing number of families from northern European countries have set up home in Spain. And for many, the move has turned out to be the best decision they ever made. They left behind an inclement climate, high stress levels, long working hours and streets too unsafe for their kids to play in. .
In their new promised land they found year-round sunshine, a laid back lifestyle and friendly towns untainted by the weekend violence of binge drinking teenagers. But not all families find their Utopia in the Mediterranean sunshine. For many the upheaval of leaving their native land and adjusting to a completely different way of life proves too much to cope with and they return home wiser for the experience (and usually considerably poorer!) If you're considering moving to Spain with children, make sure you're aware of all the common problems and pitfalls which face foreign families trying to start afresh in a new country.

As a rule of thumb, the younger your children are the more likely they are to settle abroad and adjust to all the sudden changes in their lives. Young kids can adapt quickly and easily to almost any change of circumstances as long as they're at the centre of a loving, secure family. Pre-school children pick up a new language in no time, they make new friends quickly and are likely to adapt easily to the new climate and different routine.

The older your children are when you move, the more likely they are to suffer with problems such as homesickness, isolation and feelings of inadequacy at school. No matter how loving and supportive you are as parents, teenagers are likely to find it extremely difficult to settle into a Spanish school especially if they're not fluent in the language from day one. So you'll need to consider whether you can afford private education within an international school. And if you can, you'll obviously need to do some thorough research into where the reputable schools are, what they charge and what they offer.

Getting children a place in a state run Spanish school is normally a straight forward affair for EU citizens - you can get your child in school almost immediately, it's free and you don't need to wait for a resident's permit ("residencia"). Some of the more popular schools have a waiting list but the local authorities have a responsibility to find an alternative school if necessary. In areas with large ex-pat communities, many Spanish schools provide special language coaching for newly arrived foreign children for the first few weeks.

If you plan to send your children to a Spanish school, it's important that you master the language yourself so that you can be fully involved in their education, progress and any problems that may arise. And don't forget that some areas of Spain, such as the Valencian region and Catalonia, have their own local language which is predominant in many state schools.

Brace yourself for minor hiccups and probably a few serious setbacks in the first few months. When anything goes wrong in your child's life during that initial period, he or she is likely to wail: "I want to go home!"

Be patient. It may take a year or two before your child starts thinking of Spain as home.

10 steps to potty training!

2008-09-14T11:33:00.003+02:00

My little boy is going to be 2 in a couple of weeks and is constantly ripping off his nappy and randomly weeing all over the place! I have bought him a potty and have gently been encouraging him to use it.......he's getting there! Here are perhaps some good tips for anyone else in the same boat!.

Although there are no hard and fast rules, these tips should help make the journey from nappy to potty more smooth. Remember, however, that accidents are inevitable at first – so don’t be angry or make a fuss. If, however, your toddler shows any signs of distress about potty training, or has lots of accidents, stop for a week or more before trying again.

TOP 10 WAYS TO POTTY TRAIN

1 Make your purchase
From around 18 months onwards, buy a comfortable, broad-based potty. Let him sit on it for fun now and again – before bath time is a good time to try. Tell him what it’s for, and if he does anything in it, praise him. If he’s not happy, wait a few days and try again.

2 Choose a pot spot
Decide on a place to keep the potty so that he gets used to where it’s kept, and when you think he’s ready, increase his number of daily visits. Every time he sits on it, remind him what you hope he’ll do on it from time to time, and always praise him if he does something.

3 Time it right
Continue with these occasional sessions. If your child does a poo at more or less the same time every day, get him to sit on the potty at that time, explaining and reminding him what it’s for. If his habits aren’t regular, watch out for the signs that he is about to ‘go’ (reddening face, concentrated look, standing still) and quickly put him on the potty.

4 Bear his bottom
Leave his nappy off from time to time. Try this one morning or afternoon when you’re at home, and tell him it’s because he is learning how to use the potty. Sit him on the potty now and then. He may wet or dirty lots of pairs of pants without using the potty - if so, go back to steps 2 and 3, and wait a few days before trying again.

5 Ask him nicely
Start asking him if he needs the potty - but don’t nag! He may sometimes refuse and then
promptly wet his pants. If this is the case, don’t criticise. Help to increase his sense of independence by reducing the number of times you decide to put him on the potty - your aim is to help him recognise the signals for himself.

6 Skip to the loo
Once he’s comfortable with the potty and you think he understands what it’s for, you can start to encourage him to use the toilet. To make sure he feels comfortable and safe on the loo, buy him a special trainer seat and explain to him that using the loo is what grown-ups do (he’s probably seen you on it enough times!).

7 Be prepared
Put him on the potty or toilet before you go out. It'll take time for him to learn to urinate at will without having first felt the urge to go, so be patient with him.

8 Make allowances
Gradually leave your child nappy-free for longer, more frequent periods. You might want to use disposable trainer pants instead, especially when you’re away from home or when you don’t know if there’ll be a toilet you can get to quickly. These absorb accidents but can also be pulled up and down like ordinary pants. Accidents are unavoidable: try to be sympathetic rather than irritated!

9 Relinquish the power
Let your child use the loo more often in preference to the potty, and allow him to decide for himself more and more often when he wants to use it. Try to keep your reminders to an absolute minimum.

10 Bye-bye nappies!
When he is clean and dry most days, use nappies only at night. He'll probably still have a few accidents, but keep on persevering. Remember, he'll still need help from you with the more advanced skills of bottom-wiping and dealing with zips and buttons.

Good Luck!

Postnatal Depression Support Network

2008-09-14T11:27:00.006+02:00

Postnatal Depression or PND as it is known, is a very common condition that can occur after childbirth. It affects up to 15% of all new mothers. It is more likely you may suffer from PND if you have a past history of depression, have undergone big life changes during pregnancy, are lacking support at home, if the baby was unplanned or unwanted, the baby has health problems but, sometimes, PND arrives unexpectedly and none of these factors seem to have a bearing.

Ultimately, the stress and responsibility of motherhood may be enough for some women to feel this way. The important thing is to talk to somebody about how you are feeling.

Symptoms of postnatal depression
The symptoms are very similar to other types of depression, i.e apathy or feeling constantly tired and unable to enjoy anything, sleeping too much, lack of interest in anything, overwhelming feelings of sadness or despair, anxiety, compulsions (like constantly cleaning or washing your hands repeatedly), being unable to concentrate, feeling irritable, and excessive crying.

In addition to these feelings, new mothers suffering with PND may experience feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness and feeling completely unable to cope with the demanding task of being a mother to a new baby. The reality of life with a newborn is often a shock to first-time mothers and can create very negative feelings in a woman. Sleep and appetite are often affected in a detrimental fashion, as is learning to take care of another person who is completely reliant upon you; this can be a daunting and overwhelming period of time.

Anxiety is another very common symptom; the fear of something harmful happening to your baby can make the mother feel tense and tearful. Frightening panic attacks, that leave the mother short of breath and feeling as if something terrible is about to happen, are also common.
If you are experiencing any of these symptoms or feel you are unable to cope you must seek medical advice. This does NOT mean you are a bad mother.

Don't feel like you're alone. Post a comment on our forums and talk to other mums who may have been through a similar experience. We have a support network for Mums who think they may be suffering from some form of depression with a resident counsellor, Roxanne Claude, on hand to answer any questions.
www.mumsinspain.com/forum

My Top 10 Tips for giving birth in Spain

2008-09-14T11:19:00.005+02:00

1) Not many hospitals offer antenatal classes but they really are worth seeking out privately if this is the case for you. There are a number of independent midwives offering classes throughout Spain. You can either join a group class or in some cases have private sessions. I didn’t have any and I do regret this, not just for me but also for my partner who didn’t have a clue on the day! www.mumsinspain.com

2) If you are planning to breastfeed try to find as much support as possible. Hospital staff do encourage you to breastfeed but most do not offer anything in terms of help or advice. It is possible that you have a La Leche League group in your area who could give good advice, or if you have used a midwife for antenatal classes they could offer some support. Failing that talk to some experienced breastfeeding mums. www.mumsinspain.com

3) There is a high caesarian rate in Spain, particularly private hospitals. It is best to be prepared for this just incase by reading up a little about them and what expect. Your hospital stay will be longer than a natural delivery which is normally one over night stay, with caesarian it is up to 5 days and you should expect to find it difficult to move around for approx 2 weeks afterwards. This is worse case scenario but it is better to be prepared. Even if you do have a natural delivery it would pay to plan to have help when you come home.
There is little in way of support in the hospital after delivery and nothing when you come home, no health visitor system like in the UK, so someone to help with the house or younger siblings would be a great help, and possibly a home visit from a local independent midwife to check you and baby are well and coping. www.mumsinspain.com

4) It will save a lot of stress if you could make sure you know how to go about registering your baby before their arrival so that neither you or your partner are panicking after the baby has arrived wondering how to go about it. Locate your local civil registry office and find out a little bit about the process and what papers you will need to take. There is a time limit on registering your baby.

5) Don’t be afraid to ask questions from your Obstetrician or primary care giver. If a tour of the delivery suite is available request one. It might seem scary when you see it for the first time but it really doesn’t look the same way to you when you are in labour! My hospital didn’t offer me a tour but I did ask for one and they were glad to accommodate. I was horrified afterwards but it all looked a lot more welcoming on the day!

6) Do take anything that could make your labour more comfortable, i.e. a pillow, comfy T-shirt, birthing ball. Most hospitals will not offer much in the way of “comforts” so better to be prepared. I did pack CDs with me but I didn’t listen to any of them, but at least I had them incase. A big pillow or cushion would have been great to kneel on or lean against though with those hard marble floors! A birthing ball even better! I would include a good supportive birthing partner in my list of comforts too!
If you are planning to breastfeed perhaps take a breastfeeding pillow with you as the hospital beds can be uncomfortable and awkward to get a good position in, especially post-caesarian.

7) Pack a coming home outfit for your baby, but hospitals tend to provide everything for the baby including blankets, baby-gros, nappies, hats, etc. Do check with your hospital first if you are not sure. You will need some stuff for yourself though like breastpads, nursing bra, disposable pants and a nightdress that you can feed from easily as hospital robes are not practical for this, as well as maternity pads, although the hospital can provide you with these during your stay. Better to pack a couple of days worth of everything just incase your stay in hospital is a little longer than expected.

8) Never be afraid to ask for help or feel intimidated by any language barrier. If you aren’t sure of something get your partner to find someone who can understand you, there is sure to be at least one person who can speak a little English.

9) Speak to other mums about their own experiences and learn about what you can expect of your hospital care, etc. Do remember though that everyone’s birth experience is different, even within the same hospitals. Horror stories do the rounds wherever you live. Talk to as many different mums as possible and get a balanced view. www.mumsinspain.com

10) Keep an open mind! Giving birth may well be a different experience in Spain compared to the UK for example, but different doesn’t necessarily mean worse.

Good luck! You’ll be fine

New Spanish School Year

2008-09-08T12:02:00.005+02:00

The new school year is one week away and lots of little ones will be taking a very grown up step forward with their first day at big school. You can send your little one from the age of three over here, although legally it is not compulsory until they are six. It seems such a tiny age to send them off, but the hours are 9 til 2 which is the same as lots of children are spending at nursery anyway and the structure of the day is very much preschool, so plenty of learning through play. Here is a really comprehensive article about the school system in Spain which you might find useful:

Spain's state-funded school system (escuela pública) is supported by a comprehensive network
of private schools (escuelas privadas), including many foreign and international schools. Around one third of Spain's schoolchildren attend private schools, most of which are co -educational day schools.
State education is the responsibility of the Ministry of Education and Science (Ministerio de Educación y Ciencia), although authority can be delegated to regional governments. Of the 17
autonomous regions, seven (Andalusia, the Basque Lands, the Canary Islands, Catalonia, Galicia, Navarre and Valencia) have responsibility for their own education system (including higher education). State education is free but parents must usually pay for school books (which are expensive, although they are provided free in certain cases), school supplies, and extra curricular activities such as sports and arts and crafts. Pupils usually go to local village (pueblo) nursery and primary schools, although attending secondary school may entail travelling long distances (buses are provided). Compulsory education (escolaridad obligatoria), termed the basic general education (Educación General Básica/EGB), begins at six years of age in a primary school (escuela primaria) and lasts for eight years. At the age of 14 (equivalent to eighth grade) pupils receive a school -leaving certificate, which determines the course of their future education. Those with high marks are awarded a título de graduado escolar certificate and attend a higher secondary school to study for their baccalaureate (bachillerato). Less academically gifted pupils are awarded a school certificate (certificado de escolaridad) and attend a vocational school (formación profesional) providing specialized training for a specific career.

Enrolment
The normal registration period is in May for the following September, and is usually done at the
local town hall (or sometimes by applying directly to a school). Enrolment in a Spanish school requires an interview and in rare cases an examination. New arrivals in Spain must have their children's education record officially verified through a process known as homologation (homologación) or validation. This is an expensive and lengthy process involving the confirmation of credits and marks for each year of schooling. It can be very expensive, e.g. 300 € to 1200 €, depending on the number of years to be validated. Without the necessary paperwork a child won't be accepted at a state school, irrespective of his qualifications (foreign qualifications such as the British GCSE aren't recognized in Spain). If possible, this process should be completed before arriving in Spain, as a child may not be accepted at a school until the official papers (confirming validation) have been received and stamped by the Spanish Department of Education. In Spain, children must attend a state school within a certain distance of their home, so if you have a preference for a particular school, it's important to buy or rent a home within that school catchment's area. Town halls and provincial Ministry of Education offices can provide a list of local schools at all levels. To enrol a child in a Spanish school you must provide your town hall with the following documents:
your child's birth certificate or passport, with an official Spanish translation (if necessary); The academic year in Spain runs from the first week in September to the end of June, with the main holidays at Christmas, Easter and the long summer break. School hours vary depending on the particular school and are usually from 0900 until 1600 with a one hour break for lunch, although an increasing number of schools don't have a lunch break and finish classes for the day at 1400. Lessons are usually divided into teaching periods of 45 minutes. State schools and communities usually provide an after school nursery (guardería) for working mothers.

Spanish school children have long school holidays (vacaciones escolares) compared with many other countries. School terms are fixed and are generally the same throughout the country, although they may be modified in autonomous regions to take account of local circumstances and special events (such as local fiestas). The school year is made up of three terms, each averaging around 11 weeks.

School holiday dates are published by schools and local communities well in advance, thus allowing parents plenty of time to schedule family holidays during the school holidays.

Pre-school education (Educaciòn Infantil)
Spain has a long tradition of state-funded pre-school (preescuelar), with over 90 per cent of children aged four or five attending for at least one year before starting compulsory schooling.
The term pre-school embraces play school, nursery school (guardería), kindergarten (jardín de la infancia) and infant school (escuela infantil).

Under the LOGSE reforms, pre-school education is divided into two cycles; cycle one (ciclo 1º) for ages one to three and cycle two (ciclo 2º) for ages four to six. Attendance is voluntary and ree in public centers in many areas until the age of 5. The obligatory age for starting school is 5 years old.In addition to state-funded schools, there are also many private fee-paying nursery schools,
usually taking children aged from two to six, some of which are an integral part of a larger primary school. Arrangements are generally flexible and parents can choose attendance during
mornings or afternoons, all day, or on selected days only. Many schools provide transport to and from homes. Fees are generally low and schools are popular, well-organized and good value for money.

Children learn about social, personal and environmental values, as well as developing their
physical and mental skills. During the final years of nursery school, the rudiments of reading,
writing, English and arithmetic are taught in preparation for primary school.
Nursery school is highly recommended, particularly if your children are going to continue with a
state education. After one or two years of nursery school they will be integrated into the local
community and will have learnt Spanish in preparation for primary school.

Primary schools (Educaciòn Primaria)
At six, children move to primary school. It last for 6 years and is divided into 3 cylces. Pupils will
study Spanish language, Maths, Conocimiento del Medio (include biology, history, geography...), a second language, art and physical education. In addition most of them will study religion.
Although State education is free, parents will still have to buy books, material and pay for extra
activities.

Secondary Education schools (El Instituto)
At age 12, children progress to Secondary school. The first 4 years are called ESO (Educaciòn Secondaria Obligatoria) and children can leave the education system at the end of this section (or at the age of 16). The EsO is divided into 2 cycles of 2 years each (with the possibility of repeating the first year)
At the end of the 4 years, students will obtain a certificate. For most of the students who choose
to stay at school, they will then follow a 2 years Bachillerato academic course. There are 4 types of Bachillerato: Arts, Humanities, Natural and Health Sciences and Technology. At the end of the 2 years students will stand examinations during the monthj of May and the final result will be based both on results and continuous assessment.

University
In June, students who wish to go to University take a general University entrance examination
(PAU) and the courses they will be able to follow depends on that examination and the result of the Bachillerato. Students may take as long as necessary to complete their degree, repeating courses and spreading out examinations over years.

InformationAEEA - Andalusian Association of Spanish Schools for Foreigners - Marbella, Spain Nathalie
Boone Ctra Nacional 340, km 189, 6 Marbela, Malaga 29600 - Spain
http://www.aeea.es/

Outdoor play

2008-08-27T14:44:00.002+02:00

I had a friend visiting from London last weekend, escaping the non-existent UK Summer! We had a nice lunch before she left at the Kempinski Hotel, down in their garden restaurant alongside the beach. They had a great little playground area all enclosed with a picket fence for little ones so we popped down there when we had finished eating.

Charlie had such a great time on the slide and see-saw and as I looked at him it occurred to me how fortunate both of us are be here. There he was having fun in the sun with palm trees behind him and lots of fresh air. It can be all too easy to get caught up with the negatives sometimes, but ultimately this is a great place to raise a child for so many reasons and this is just one of them.

New Spanish online store - www.indybel.com

2008-08-27T14:42:00.003+02:00

A new online store for pregnancy and baby in Spain has just been launched! Indybel specialise in British and International pregnancy and baby products as well as innovative and organic products for pregnancy, birth and beyond … and it is owned and run by two Mums who met on MumsinSpain.com! How great is that. Please support Sam and Lesley by checking out their website http://www.indybel.com/

The story of Indybel

Indybel was set up by Sam and Lesley who met last summer via mumsinspain! Here is their story in their own words. “Firstly it has to be said that our company Indybel would never have existed without mumsinspain.com! Our daughters are roughly the same age and we live near each other, and so via Claire’s website we became friends and baby confidents. A while after we met we found that a lot of our conversations were taken up with moans and groans about baby products we wanted to buy but couldn’t find here in Spain. We both relied heavily on friends and family bringing things over from the UK and we knew many others here who were in the same situation. That was October 2007 now nearly 11 months later http://www.indybel.com/ (named after our daughters India and Isabella) is finally here! Starting a business with two small (often grumpy) toddlers in tow has not been easy! In fact as they have got older it has become more difficult as our girls need more entertaining and we need more time to work. We have found working with babies to be a completely unpredictable experience, one day they’ll happily play together for hours on end, needing hardly any attention and we can sit at the laptop and smile over at our wonderful daughters, the next they act as if they can’t stand each other and cling to our ankles as if we were the meanest, least affectionate mums in the world. At times like these it’s almost impossible to work properly and we have come to realise that starting a business in Spain is all the harder because often there is less extended family around to support you and those that are here work full time. Aside from the complexities of actually setting up an SL company our main challenges have included the logo design, website design and deciding what we can afford to sell as opposed to what we would really like to sell! Choosing products has been really exciting. We started off with a wish list and changed our minds about a lot of products which were either too expensive and we felt wouldn’t sell, or weren’t quite what we were looking for. We have always been very clear about our aim, which is to offer the types of products that we have found we have needed over the last 18 months but just couldn’t find here in Spain, as well as a good organic range. As our babies grow we find there are more things we need ourselves and so we are adding products with experience! ( right now we are going through toilet training! ) We went to the Baby Show in London last year and found some brilliant new products and Lesley ( while pregnant with number 2 !) has managed to find the time and energy to pop over to Thailand twice to source manufacturers, suppliers and products for our own brand items! We are hoping to visit two more UK trade shows this October in order to continue to be able to offer the most up to date, exciting and innovative products on the site. There is so much still to do and most of our days are spent juggling babies, emails, meetings and whenever possible grabbing just a few minutes here and there researching on the net. But despite the sleepless nights, having to take our babies to meetings, working into the small hours once they are sleeping and the ongoing fear it could all be a huge disaster and we might be bankrupt this time next year, it’s been so exciting to launch our business and right now, we wouldn’t change a thing!!” Sam and Lesley

Hard Spanish Surfaces

2008-08-27T14:35:00.002+02:00

I remember when Charlie started to crawl at the very early age of 5 months that I was quite concerned about how his little knees and legs would find the hard floors that are so common in Spain. We have marble in our house and I had always assumed that would only be a concern when he started to walk, but of course crawling brings with it its own problems. Although Charlie's knees seemed to be fine, apart from the odd bruise from crawling over door frames some children do suffer. I did come across a rather unique product sometime ago for crawling babies, have a look at this:
http://www.bayon.es/cart.php?action=detalle&idp=3283&idSEC=48&categoria=&subcategoria=&inicio=0
what will they think up next! But I am sure it does help protect little ones.

If anything I found that the marble assisted Charlie crawling as he had less resistance than he would with a carpet, and certainly moved a lot faster! Good for him, not so great for me!!!

I made good use of those sponge squares that you can buy in packs on most supermarkets or toy stores. We used these are doorways where there was step or change of level so if he fell he had a soft landing, as well as simply setting out a big square in the room with his toys which was a little padded. They were great and inexpensive. The best things generally are!

Looking for a mother and toddler group?

2008-08-14T14:17:00.002+02:00

Looking for a group to go to with your baby or toddler in your area of Spain? We have lots of information on the site posted by myself and other members. From baby massage to yoga, straight forward mother and baby groups to singing and dancing!

http://mumsinspain.com/forum/index.php?c=11

NEXT comes to Spain!

2008-08-14T14:14:00.000+02:00

For those of you who miss shopping at NEXT, I have just come across www.nextdirectory.eu You can order all your childrens clothes, maternity wear and even buy something for the hubby if you like and they deliver to Spain for just 7.50 euros!! Hooray!

Freecycle

2008-08-14T14:13:00.000+02:00

The Freecycle Network™ is made up of 4,557 groups with 5,525,000 members across the globe. It's a grassroots and entirely nonprofit movement of people who are giving (& getting) stuff for free in their own towns. It's all about reuse and keeping good stuff out of landfills. Each local group is moderated by a local volunteer (them's good people). Membership is free. www.freecycle.org Lo and behold, we have a group in Fuengirola!!
Fab site, and the more members we have, the better it becomes!

Great website for all things handmade

2008-08-14T14:12:00.000+02:00

I came across this today and I am going to look at it a little closer. It is a community bringing together people who make things themselves to sell. Some lovely things on there. Maybe a Mum in Spain could use it to sell their own products.

www.etsy.com

Baby Cheque of 2500 euros!

2008-08-14T14:04:00.002+02:00

By the middle of April 2008 more than 10,000 families in the province of Malaga had obtained their 2,500 euros the government now gives out for every newborn baby or adoption. This amounts to some 25 million euros spent on the subsidy in this area, according to statistics provided by Socialist Member of Parliament Miguel Ángel Heredia. The benefit, which has become known as the “baby cheque”, came into force in July last year. The 2,500 euros increases to 3,500 in the case of families with three or more children and single-parent families.

You can view more information about the baby cheque and common questions on our discussion forum via these links:

http://mumsinspain.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=315
http://mumsinspain.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1887
http://mumsinspain.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1556&highlight=baby+check+cheque

Bottled Water for Babies

2008-08-14T13:58:00.003+02:00

It is pretty difficult to know what to do for the best for your little one sometimes - it seems to be a permanent pre occupation, especially when they are very little. You do need to be choosy when it comes to bottle water. The only bottled water that I have read is ok to give to a baby without boiling it is Evian. I actually used Lanjaron for Charlie and I boiled it. It states on the bottle it can be used for baby food. Another brand is Font Vella Junior.

Bottled water with a sodium level of less than 20mg is best to use for babies & children however, less than 10mg is preferable. Evian contains 5mg & Font Vela Junior 13mg. The mineral contents are printed on the labels of the bottles so do check them carefully. Current health advice is to boil all water for babies under 6 months so, if you intend to boil go for the lowest possible sodium content. Magnesium & Calcium levels should be higher than Sodium as these are minerals highly utilised by the body along with potassium & zinc.

Hope that made sense! If you are confused or perhaps on holiday and don't want to take any chances a couple of the supermarkets, Hipercor for sure, sell tetrapacks of baby water all ready to be used either for formula or to drink as it is. You will find it their baby aisle.

View our discussion on this subject:
http://mumsinspain.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=1900

Giving Birth in Spain

2008-08-14T13:54:00.003+02:00

Well plenty of women have done and have lived to tell the tale, but for any new mum is can be a very anxious time! I had lived in Spain 9 years before I fell pregnant for Charlie so you would think I wouldn't be worried about giving birth in Spain, but despite speaking the language Spain still feels like a foreign country to me and I did know that giving birth was quite different than what you can watch 24 hours a day now if you want to on Discovery Home and Health!

It is this fear that got me thinking about setting up a community to help people feeling the same way and so http://www.mumsinspain.com/ was born. You can read about other mum's birth experiences on there if you follow either one these links. Like everywhere there are always horror stories, but they are in the minority. It certainly is different here in Spain, but different doesn't necessarily mean worse.

http://mumsinspain.com/forum/viewforum.php?f=2&sid=8b0c91c79e9a6a53586eb1249dbcba73

http://www.mumsinspain.com/index.php?mode=birth_stories_category

Sorry for not being around

2008-08-14T13:48:00.002+02:00

Having a little one can make you feel like you are missing a head sometimes, especially in this summer heat! I run www.mumsinspain.com so I have been adding all my news there, but I will make an effort to post on here too. Infact I am going to add some stuff today that I have already posted on my forum, hope you find some interesting bits of info.

Charlie will soon be 2 (in 2 months)! My little boy seems so grown up and has definitely matured. He is quite happy to play on his own now with his toys which is great for me as it means I can work from home more effectively, but also equally as nice to be able to watch him play like that....so cute! Kissing and talking to his toys! Car-mad Charlie is!

Claire & Charlie xx

mumsinspain.com goes Live!

2008-05-13T16:59:00.003+02:00

Finally the site for Mums in Spain is live! As well as the forum there are lots of new sections....articles and birth stories, mums in business and an A-Z Directory. There will be new additions on almost a daily basis so keep coming back..........www.mumsinspain.com

Jane Carrera Pro owners - product recall

2008-01-15T20:42:00.000+01:00

I just found out today whilst mooching online, in vain I hasten to add, for a replacement cover for my pushchair that Jané have recalled their bumpers with moveable "shoulders" as they have been classified as unsafe after a little girl harmed herself on one. The Jané official site states that all owners of a Carrera Pro with this sort of bumper bar can receive a new remodelled one, available from any Jané service centre or store stocking Jané products. The UK version of the site actually shows a picture of the old style bumper and the new one.

More specific details of the fault here:
http://ec.europa.eu/consumers/dyna/rapex/create_rapex.cfm?rx_id=153

Jané's official site:
www.jané.es

I am actually quite glad to hear it is being replaced as I thought it a little risky myself, especially as the cover to my bumper has apparently perished and Charlie can now access all the areas that have been deemed officially unsafe!

If anyone happens to know how I can get my hands on a new cover for my pushchair as mine is damaged please do drop me a line.

A Belated "Feliz Año Nuevo"

2008-01-14T17:41:00.000+01:00

I almost forget I had this blog with all the goings on of the holidays!!! Charlie and I have just returned from a week long trip in the UK so there has not been a lot of time to sit and ponder on the possiblities that 2008 might hold. Whatever they are I have a feeling they will be good! 2007 was a tough year for me and for some inexplicable reason I have a good feeling for 2008. During my Sky flicking I came across a channel where someone was saying that 2007 was a bad year for many people as it was a year of endings, 2008 looks much brighter! That's definitely worth a "here, here"!

Seasons Greetings!

2007-12-27T21:58:00.000+01:00

Merry Christmas to anyone reading this, hope you had a wonderful time with those dear to you. We celebrated Christmas in Spain this year, just the three of us. Although all of the stores are geared up for Christmas now, much more so than my first Christmas here 10 years ago, it still lacks something for me. I think if ever there were a time of year that even the most integrated of foreigner were to feel home sick it would be Christmas. You can find all of your home comforts like turkey, mincepies, christmas puddings in the stores now fairly easily, there are Christmas Carols playing and even Father Christmas sat waiting for the little ones to have their photo taken with him......the ones who are not pretrified that is! But, for me at least, it just isn't the same. Perhaps it is the weather? Not just that the sun is most years shining which in itself is not "Christmas" let's be honest, but also that it is still light at 5pm and that no sooner have you finished your festive turkey it is time to get back to "normal" on the 26th with no Boxing Day to sit with your feet up, completely stuffed by the annual box of Quality Street, with a remote control in one hand and a glass of something in the other.

But now that we have a family of our own I did feel more Christmasey than usual it has to be said. I imagine that as Charlie gets older that feeling will only grow. For the first time I was not interested in the gifts I had to open, I was more excited to see him open his!

As much as my traditions have dictated to me what Christmas is, perhaps new traditions will be made as I raise my young family in Spain and in years to come Christmas simply won't be Christmasey without a little sunshine and a chorus of "Feliz Navidad"!

Sleep Baby Sleep

2007-12-14T23:49:00.001+01:00

Oh dear, at 14 months of age I am still struggling to keep Charlie sleeping consistently well. We just seem to get back on track and he is ill, or we are away, or he is teething, etc, etc! We were away in the UK in October and he was sleeping in the same room as me, then again on our 2 week vacation this month, and now of course he doesn't want to be in his room! On top of this he is heavily jetlagged and tonight is the first night I have managed to get him to sleep before 2am!!! Sadly it took over an hour of fretful screams and urging from him before he finally called it a night at 11:30pm. I never thought I would find myself in this position! Just goes to show! He is such a happy little chap that many people would not even believe it possible that he could make such a fuss. I have tried everything, controlled crying, pick-up put-down, singing, rocking, favourite toys in the cot, warm room, cool room, night light, darkness! It does make you feel very helpless and inadequate!

www.babywhisperer.com

My travel "must haves"

2007-12-09T20:40:00.000+01:00

Admittedly it is easier travelling when you are no longer sterilising but there is still a lot to think about when you are going abroad. I am a worrier and was concerned about even washing Charlie's bottles in tap water in the Dominican Republic so antibacterial wipes were a must.

Also for the trip there we spent some time sat at the airport where it was hard to entertain a crawling baby, plus we were restricted with space to pack toys so I took a bag of balloons. They take no space and will amuse them for ages. I inflated them partially when we were on the airplane so when they were popped they did not make a noise or wiss around all the other passengers heads!!!

Another great thing I packed was a set of stacking cubes, the ones that fit inside of each other. They were only a cheap set from Supersol, around 3 euros I think I paid, and they were great for not only on the plane but when we were there, play time in the room and also perfect for the beach. We made sand castles with them and some have a print on the bottom of them, each cube different and we could make stamps in the sand with the picture. They were brilliant!

I tried without success to get a sunshade for Charlie's pushchair before we went although I did see one online in the UK but it was too late to order. I packed a cot white flat sheet and we used this when he was asleep in his pushchair to keep the sun off of him (he had block on him too as I think white cotton is factor 10) and help keep him cool.

Sunsuit, an absolute must! Makes life a lot easier and you are not worrying about having missed a bit with cream and that they might burn. Charlie is the same colour after 2 weeks in the Carribean sun as he was when we left! Healthy for him.

Home Sweet Home

2007-12-09T20:27:00.000+01:00

One of the best things about living here is coming back from the sun to the sun!!! The house was freezing from being closed up for 2 weeks but as soon as we opened up all the windows and doors the heat came radiating in! It certainly helps keep the holiday blues at bay to have weather like that on December 9th!! Charlie was an absolute trooper on the trip back, I don't know how he does it. I think he slept for 2 hours maximum on the flight back from Punta Cana to Madrid and then was awake for the 4 hours til our flight to Malaga and then slept for 1.5 hours more. Driving home he still had a smile on his face which almost seems to be fixed there permanently he has displayed it so many times on holiday! The people are fantastic in the Dominican Republic with children, it was a great few weeks.

Off on our travels!

2007-11-22T16:32:00.000+01:00

Well we leave tomorrow for our first proper holiday as a family to the Dominican Republic. I feel like we are competing with Victoria Beckham for luggage as there seems to be so much of it! I have been away quite a lot over the last year but always to stay with family and friends so I have bought most things I needed for my stay once I got there. This time however I have to pack everything! Food, milk, nappies, swimnappies, snacks, toys, etc, etc, for 2 weeks! Phew! Hopefully I will have tales of holiday happiness to share with you on my return when Christmas will be just 2.5 weeks away! Crikey!

Hasta luego!

Fertility Matters

2007-11-22T16:00:00.000+01:00

It took me two long years to conceive Charlie. After an array of tests the conclusion was that there was no clinical reason why I could not get pregnant. I started on a course of acupuncture and Chinese Herbal Medicine as a last ditch attempt before turning to assisted reproduction and after 4 months I got a positive on a pregnant test! I kept a blog with a record of my experience, not only for myself to look back on but also to hopefully help others going through a similar experience. It was a very dark period in my life at times but Charlie was worth every day that I waited!

http://costaclaire.blog.co.uk

We do have a section for those trying to conceive or facing fertility issues on www.mumsinspain.com. Another site I can highly recommend if you have been trying for a long time or are looking to turn to assisted conception methods is www.fertilityfriends.co.uk, they have a great forum and also quite a few women who are travelling from the UK to receive treatment at various clinics in Spain so plenty of information and experiences to share. I myself have experience of Ceram Clinic in Marbella where I had my fertility investigations www.ceram.es. They have one the highest success rates for IVF in Spain as far as I recall and Ruth Pellow, fertility nurse at the clinic is also a moderator on the Spanish board on Fertility Friends.

Zara Home online

2007-11-21T15:08:00.000+01:00

Worth mentioning that Zara Home are now offering online shopping. I have yet to check it out myself but I am sure there will be plenty of temptation! Goes without saying I will be looking at the children's section first! Why is that?? I hardly ever look for myself anymore when I shop, even if I go out with that intention I always end up getting distracted by things for Charlie!

www.zarahome.com

Travelling with a baby

2007-11-21T14:52:00.000+01:00

I have travelled a far bit with Charlie in his first year and a bit of life as I imagine many of you will have done with your little ones living abroad. I remember when I was pregnant that the thought of travelling with a baby terrified me, but when it actually came to it I found the experience enjoyable! The first time I flew with Charlie he was 8 weeks old and I was with my husband then. The second time he was 11 weeks old and we were alone. It was January 17th, 2007 and a huge storm hit England. My plane managed to land at Stansted Airport but I waited 1.5 hours for my luggage and pushchair because it was too windy for the captain to open the hold door! So there I was, stood in luggage reclaim, with this young baby waiting for my bags and I had a connecting flight to the Channel Islands fast approaching take off time. Finally I got my bags and pushchair and ran to check in for my next flight, got through the rigmaroll of security again, read on the screen that the plane was boarding at the gate, ran for it, only to find on arrival that the plane had been cancelled due to the bad weather!! Charlie and I ended up stranded at Stansted that night. The trains were cancelled because of the weather, trees were down on all the major motorways so a taxi to central London was not an option, all of the closest hotels were full of other stranded passengers! We just about managed to get a B&B a short distance away and I burst into tears when the guy confirmed it to me!! The following day the next available flight was full so Charlie and I had to take a National Express coach to Gatwick and get on another flight!!! What an adventure!

How were we through all of this? I was a blubbering mess.......my son was serene and calm simply sitting in his buggy gazing up at me with, I swear, a small smirk of amusement on his face at all this chaos! Bless him!

Now I always make sure I am prepared for every eventuality!! My husband actually made a remark to me that surprised me, he said that it was nice travelling with a baby as you took your time more. It is so true. Normally everyone charges off of the plane as fast as they possibly can, races to get to the passport control queue as fast as possible, collect bags and off you go. When you have a baby you have no choice but to take it at a slower pace and to a certain degree what will be will be. Far more stress free in that respect.

A good website with a growing amount of information for those travelling with little ones is http://www.holidaywithbaby.com/. It has a good section on ideal destinations for young families, etc as well as helpful packing suggestions.

Happy Holidays!

In the Night Garden

2007-11-21T12:34:00.001+01:00

Does anyone else absolutely love this programme! It reminds me of the kind of thing I might have watched when I was little, so gentle and nice. I have tried not to introduce Charlie to children's television yet as he has plenty of time for that in the years to come but on the odd occassion we have flicked to CBeebies this is the program that has been on. Now when it comes on he looks at me and immediately wants to sit on my lap to watch it! He is mesmerised and to be honest so am I!! A friend told me it is the most researched children's programme ever and costs a fortune to make. The BBC might not be as up to scratch as they used to be in other areas, but in Childrens Television they stil excel.

www.inthenightgarden.co.uk

Klingon??

2007-11-20T10:48:00.000+01:00

I know I said I wanted Charlie to be tri-lingual but was the third language Klingon? It certainly sounds like he has mastered it this morning! Every week or so he seems to shift from the sounds he generally makes to this strange but adorable noise and just chats all day like he is excited by his new found ability! If you could bottle the way it makes me feel when he talks like that the world would be a happier place!!

"Baby on Board"

2007-11-19T21:21:00.000+01:00

Spain is well known for being child friendly. It is always a culture shock for me when I do head back home in that children are not always welcome at restaurants in the evening and even if they can be accomodated friends frown on the fact that we plan to bring them. Spain couldn't be more opposite and I love that. But I am at a loss to understand how a nation that pours over young babies and toddlers offers so little in the way of real facilities. Changing tables, feeding rooms, highchairs in restaurants, mother and baby parking spaces, etc. They are few and far between. Having said that even if there were mother and baby parking spaces they would probably be taken by any tom, dick or harry much the same as disabled spaces are respected!! Here on the Coast there are an increasing amount of restaurants offering facilities like highchairs and some even fitting changing fold-down tables but they are still sadly in the minority and nine times out of ten I found myself laying Charlie on the floor in a small cubicle to change him. Don't forget to pack that changing mat!

Christmas Tree with a Toddler

2007-11-19T18:27:00.000+01:00

I have always loved my tree, I love Christmas full stop! Last year Charlie was immobile, sitting quietly in a bouncy chair.....this year he is into everything, literally! Just pulled him out of a cupboard! So what should I do about a tree, are there any solutions. I thought of putting it outside and just having extra Christmas decorations around the place inside to compensate but I am not sure about having the tree on the terrace. Perhaps I shouldn't bother at all....

I have seen someone online mention a tree skirt ring that you can buy in Babies R us that has walls to keep baby away but I am not sure if they stock them in Spain. Maybe I should get out Charlie's playpen and use that to keep him away.

I did see some play yards on http://www.ebay.es/ which would be good but they would take up too much room in my lounge I think!

These sites give some good safety information about Christmas and toddlers:

http://www.childalert.co.uk/
http://www.capt.org.uk/

Are Spanish babies smaller than average?

2007-11-19T15:36:00.000+01:00

I only ask as since birth everyone has remarked how enormous Charlie is, from the very moment he was born actually! the Dr's first words were "que grande!". The thing is he was distinctly average, 3.5 kilos and 53 cms. The cleaners and the nurses on our ward all said the same and the comments haven't stopped since. I have English friends whose babies are just as big and even bigger and I actually think he is quite small in the sense he has a little face and very compact body. Is it perhaps because Spanish babies are very small??

Chickenpox vaccine

2007-11-19T15:27:00.000+01:00

These are fairly new and still optional, you need to pay extra mind. Charlie had his when we went for his 13 month vaccination visit last week. He has been fine with all of his other vaccinations, barely any side effects at all other than a little sleepy, but this time he really seemed to suffer. Maybe it is just because he is that bit older now and more aware but after having the vaccine in the morning, by the late afternoon he was very upset and just crying which is very unlike him. He wouldn't even take his bottle at bedtime or any medicine. He didn't have a temperature but was obviously feeling very sorry for himself. The vaccine cost about 40 euros.

Bi-lingual babies

2007-11-19T14:51:00.000+01:00

Being English speaking myself and with a Swedish husband living in Spain Charlie has his hands full. Up until now he is really only exposed to English at any length. You hear of it taking longer for multi-lingual children to start speaking and I do worry sometimes with the pressure of getting it right how we should best approach introducing him to all of these languages. We do want him to be tri-lingual. A friend mentioned this site and I hope it will answer many of the questions that I have http://www.bilingualbabies.org

Keeping family informed

2007-11-19T14:42:00.000+01:00

When I was pregnant I actually had a webpage for Charlie with scan pictures, etc to keep my family up to date with everything as it happened. No birth video on YouTube though!!! The internet is fantastic now when you live abroad as it is so great being able to involve people in ways that otherwise wouldn't be possible.

If you are pregnant or have a little one already and would like to set something like this up a good site is http://www.babysites.com/, they have great templates and make it really easy for you to upload anything relevent so all your friends and family can check in and see how you and bump are doing, you can keep using it right through to when they are born and beyond.

Spanish Baby Online Stores

2007-11-19T14:32:00.000+01:00

I know that there is a wealth of shops online based in the UK and elsewhere but even though they stock a great array of products the delivery costs always end up being pricey, and even if you are in the UK to collect them you still have to get them back with you, so I have been trying to find some Spanish stores online that I can use with a little more ease.

I actually bought my travel system from an online store, it was free delivery from Barcelona, got to me within 10 days which was better than the local El Corte Ingles could do, and all in all I was very happy. They have all sorts of other things as well http://www.chiquiguay.com/

Although I haven't actually ordered anything from them, http://www.bayon.es/ seems to be another very good site for online shopping in Spain for all things baby / children related.

I was desperately looking for someone who sold large fireguards and came across this site too which might be worth a closer look http://www.bebemibebe.com/

Verbaudet also have a Spanish site http://www.vertbaudet.es/

Happy Shopping!

Formula milk in Spain

2007-11-19T14:14:00.000+01:00

Why is it so bloney expensive? I just don't understand it. The first brand of milk I gave Charlie was recommended by my paedatrician, Blemil Plus Forte, and it was over 23 euros a box!! Just the regular more popular brands like Nestle, Hero and Aptamil are still at least 14 euros which is significantly more expensive than in the UK for example.

Today I have been to Gibraltar to shop as I think it is worth it. I have bought 10 large tins of SMA progress milk as Charlie is still on follow on milk, at a cost of 6.99 pounds each, so I have probably saved myself about 40 euros on that one visit.

Only problem is I have probably already spent what I have saved as I end up getting tempted by all the other things that they have there!! Don't even mention the Christmas aisle!!

Baby goods and toys in Spain for holidaymakers

2007-11-19T10:02:00.000+01:00

In my online research for www.mumsinspain.com I came across a great company who organise baby packs for people coming to Spain on holiday. As we all know you don't get an extra luggage allowance for infants sitting on your lap during the flight which makes packing food, nappies, milk, etc quite tricky. I know I have had to pack hardly anything for myself just to fit it all into my suitcase. Anyway http://www.bebebel.co.uk/ will fix that for you! They have different packs available according to your needs and make sure it is waiting for you wherever you are staying.

Someone else worth mentioning is a baby equipment hire company on the Costa del Sol http://www.travellinlite.com. What makes them more interesting if they actually hire out toys boxes as well which I think is a brilliant idea. They have them in age ranges and you can hire them by the day or week. I always take a small bag of toys with me for Charlie when I travel and invariably buy more when I am away to keep him amused but this is a fantastic service.

Protective sunsuits out of season

2007-11-19T09:49:00.000+01:00

We are leaving for a family holiday this weekend, a much needer break for all, but I found it so difficult to find "summer" accessories out of season, even living on the Coast of the Sun!! Thank goodness for the internet is all I can say. I went to every store I could think of locally looking for a sunsuit for Charlie but couldn't find them anywhere. Anyway I came across a webpage selling sunsuits and other accessories for babies and children based in Spain so FREE delivery! http://www.rafisol.com/ is based in Granada and has a great collection of suits, seperates, beach shoes and reusable swims nappies. All I need to do now is find something for myself which is proving a lot more difficult!

Cold mornings, cold little feet

2007-11-19T09:38:00.000+01:00

You know when Winter is here when you don't want to crawl out from under your duvet in the morning - a feeling I more associate with my years in England! It is definitely chilly now in the mornings and the marble floors are like ice. I have been worried about Charlie's feet as he had them bare all Summer, but now of course the floor is very cold and so are his feet. As he is not a firm walker yet slippers seemed too chunky and restricting, not to mention he would have them off in seconds, so I bought him some soft leather booties from http://www.jojomamanbebe.com/ although a few different places sell them. They are perfect for inside with socks as well to keep his tootsies warm, and also prevent him from slipping when he does walk which would be the case with just socks.

Welcome to our blog!

2007-11-18T22:45:00.000+01:00

My first post on our new blog.... which has to take place late at night when the little one is fast asleep as he has a complete obsession with the laptop! People laugh when I tell them but he is so tuned into it that as soon as I open it up, regardless of where he is or what he is doing, within a millisecond he is on his way over with a huge grin on his face!! Monkey!

He is still crawling most of the time even though he can walk on his own. I think he needs more confidence and a little more balance. A lot of the time he walks like he has just downed 10 jugs of Sangria! Sadly for me, although he loves to walk, he demands that I hold his hand which means sitting time is much reduced for me at the moment!!

I hope to be able to add lots of experiences that will prove useful to other Mums out there as Charlie and I proceed through the minefield that is parenthood for me and growing up for him in Spain.

Thank you for visiting us.

Claire & Charlie / www.mumsinspain.com